Have you seen my sweet baby? He has been replaced by a Jekyll and Hyde stuffed into a toddler body. He LOOKS like Parker but ever since he got sick with an ear infection and the flu and cutting molars about a week or so ago he has been acting like a totally different baby. Perhaps he was stolen by the aliens who planted him here
(THIS IS A REAL ACTUAL ULTRASOUND OF PARKER) and they left a badly concocted clone of my sweet boy who won't eat anything but bananas that are freshly peeled and milk from a bottle. This impostor cries at the slightest provocation-- I mean if I lift my eyebrows he dissolves into tears. Someone tell me the Real Baby Parker will return soon!